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Medical info

Below you can read a number of medical aspects like conception, donor sperm and laws that may be important when planning to start a family using a known sperm donor.

The content provided below is purely informational and has been compiled based on internet-based public content. As such, it should not be considered a source for legal advice and it is advisable to consult with a UK family law specialist if you are considering becoming a parent through one of these alternative methods.

UK fertility law
UK fertility law states that if you got pregnant without the help of a UK clinic, the donor could be seen as a legal parent. Even thought a ‘donor’ is a man who donates his seed specifically for this cause, the rulings can get fuzzy if you do ‘home’ self-insemination without the help of a certified clinic.

Legal status of sperm donors
In the UK, donors who make a sperm donation through the network of HFEA licensed fertility clinics are protected by the law, whether the donation is directed to a known person or not. Donors may not be considered as legal parents of any child born as a result of their donation and cannot be asked for a any type of financial child support.

If the gamete donation happens outside the legal framework though, different parenthood right may apply, and, depending on the circumstances, donor’ parental responsibility may be claimed (see the At-home insemination section). Any individual considering giving or getting a sperm donation outside an HFEA licensed clinic is this advised to speak with a law specialist before getting involved in a private agreement.

Testing sperm & Help of clinics
First let’s look into why there is testing and why there is frozen vs fresh sperm usage.

When a straight love couple tries to conceive together, in most cases they do not undergo tests, unless there is an explicit reasons for this. On the other hand, clinics that work with anonymous traceable donors extensively examine their donors. A clinic does this for several reasons:

• checking whether the man is physically and mentally healthy and between 18 and 41 years old (these requirements differ per clinic).
• check whether the quality of the seed is sufficient enough to be frozen, unfrozen and still have enough sperm counts (approximately 50% or more of the sperm cells survive the freezing/thawing process).
• checking whether there are at-job risk factors and whether he belongs to a risk group with regard to sexually transmitted diseases, such as HIV and Hepatitis.
• find out if there are serious, hereditary disorders in the family.
• talk to a counselor to discuss the consequences of donorship.
• potential donors (and their receivers) must be aware that after examination, the majority (almost 90%) of the semen specimens analysed will fail to reach the very strict criteria required for freezing/thawing the sperm. Although in most cases this does not mean that these men have reduced fertility when using fresh sperm. This is a huge reason why aspiring parents ánd donors prefer to use fresh sperm instead of frozen, even though knowing there might be some relativeley small but possible high impact risks involved.

Based on the information above, we recommend that you get a clinics help when using sperm of a known donor. If you decide not to very aware of the risks involved and in any case make sure you have a donor agreement. If you want to get pregnant through the help of a clinic, make sure to discuss this with the donor candidate during the introductory phase.
Skipping these steps can result in:

• unconsciously transmitting sexual and inherited disorders.
• various attempts at pregnancy are unsuccessful because the quality of the seed is insufficient and / or because the intended mother appears insufficiently fertile.
• donor’ parental legal rights and responsibility may be claimed from one or both parties involved (including legal co-parenting visitation rights and financial child support)

Frozen or Fresh sperm
Not all clinics work with both frozen and fresh sperm. Make sure to ask if they do before signing up as a ‘patient’ bringing in a known donor. To ensure quality and safety reasons sperm can be tested and frozen to be quarantined for 180 days (nearly 6 months).  The donor will then need to be retested after this period before the actual treatment will start.
If you are planning to use fresh sperm (which won’t have been frozen and quarantined) you might consider testing the donor with an advanced method called Nucleic Acid Amplification Testing (NAAT).

The age of the donor
Men over the age of 45 are at greater risk of conceiving a child with a chromosomal abnormality. Older men are also more likely to have poorer sperm quality. For these reasons, clinics advise looking for a young donor, but they realize that this is not always an option.

Known donor vs anonymous traceable donors

• Anonymous traceable donors: this is an anonymous traceable donor. The donor does not know his recipient (s) and the recipient (s) does not know the donor.
  Sperm from these donors are only available through a clinic. Anonymous traceable donors are registered by clinics so that the fathered child can later find out his / her origin.
  From the age of 16, the donor child can request a number of basic information about his / her donor, such as appearance, profession, marital status, family composition and characteristics as the donor gave up at the time of the donation 16 years earlier. Personal data can only be requested from the age of 18 (this was legally introduced on 1 June 2004).
  Keep in mind that foreign clinics have different rules and registration forms than in UK clinics.
• Known donors: you can find these yourself via your own network or via Future Family. Known donors are known to the mother and (later) the child. Conversely, the mother is also known to the donor via Future Family as the donor decides himself who he will help.

Choosing between co-parenting, a known- or anonymous donor
In the interest of the aspiring mother, donor and child, Future Family only encourages working with known donors or co-parenting. This is because we believe that every child has the freedom of right to get to know and possibly meet his or her biological parent from any desired (and appropriate) age. This means that the prospective parents and donors should inform the child about his or her ancestry, preferably as early as possible and before puberty.

Fertility options

Self-insemination

With self-insemination, you (or your partner or medical specialist) inseminate the sperm using a syringe and / or thin tube in the vagina or uterus (neck). With self-insemination, you generally use fresh sperm which the donor or male co-parent donates in a cup.

The chance of pregnancy is highest if fresh sperm is used and the insemination takes place just before ovulation, so it is important to follow the cycle of the woman, there are various apps and websites that can help you keep track.

It is wise to have a health examination performed before conception attempts and to consult a medical specialist.

Frozen sperm
Most clinics and hospitals offer services to freeze the sperm. You can then collect it when you need it. The advantage is that the sperm is quarantined for half a year, checking for STDs such as HIV and AIDS, but also sperm motility. Another advantage is that it is available when you need it, which helps of the donor lives far away from you or travels a lot. This way you are less dependent on the donor. The disadvantage is that the sperm loses quality. Know that 90% of men who want to become a donor won’t have a high enough sperm quality to survive the freezing/dawning process of the sperm.

→ Legal info
→ Co-parenting

Legal information

Below you can read a number of legal aspects that may be important when planning to start a family.

The content provided below is purely informational and has been compiled based on internet-based public content. As such, it should not be considered a source for legal advice and it is advisable to consult with a UK family law specialist if you are considering becoming a parent through one of these alternative methods.

Difference donorship and co-parenting
First of all, it is important to realize that in legal terms there is an essential difference between donorship and co-parenting.

Co-parenting / Partial parenting / Co-parentship
A co-parent is someone who shares the upbringing of a child to a small or large degree with another co-parent. When you meet a co-parent via Future Family, you can choose to fulfill your wish for children together, in which case you are also the biological parents. So planned co-parenting can start before the birth of your child and even before a pregnancy.
Are you a same-sex couple a couple meeting connecting to a single? Then you agree together which of you will become the biological father and which woman will bear the child and will be the biological mother.

Spermdonor
A donor has no ‘legal’ role. A ‘spermdonor’ is a man who donates his seed/sperm, and therefor makes it available to a recipient for self-insemination or artificial insemination. There is a difference between a donor and a ‘procreator’. The procreator is the man who conceived the child through sexual intercourse with a woman. There is no sexual intercourse with a spermdonor. The donor only donates and therefore has no role in the actual conception. A donor has no legal obligations or rights in regard to the future child.

United Kingdom legal matters for alternative families
The United Kingdom is probably one of the most progressive countries in the world regarding donor conception, conscious co-parenting and same-sex parenthood rights.

Donor conception is regulated by the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Act (HFEA) of 2008, which grants equal access rights to artificial reproduction methods to everyone, regardless of their marital status or sexual orientation. Same-sex couples may become legal parents through donor conception, surrogacy or adoption.

Now, if a child can have two mums or two dads, having a third legal parent is still not possible in the UK. Co-parenting situations where three or more parents are involved can be partially recognised by obtaining parental responsibility for the partner(s) of the legal parent(s). The laws are very specific when it comes to parenthood and must be carefully reviewed before going into a co-parenting agreement (see our Co-parenting section).

Legal parents
A child cannot have more than two legal parents in the UK. Yet limited parental rights can be granted to other people involved in the child´s upbringing. A man and a woman who are not involved in a relationship may decide to have a child together and in a co-parenting configuration involving both their partners, or the partner of only one of them. From the beginning, all intended parents involved should decide who will be named on the birth certificate as legal parents (options are limited by the law though) and who will have to apply for parental responsibility.

The law defining who the legal parents are in the case of an intended co-parenting arrangement can be tricky, as they depend on the marital status of the mother as well as on the manner in which the child was conceived. Therefore, it is always advisable to establish a co-parenting agreement between the parties, which, although not considered as a binding contract by the law, may help solve possible future issues.

For more detailed information and advice on co-parenting, you may want to consult these two pages:

• Co-parenting: Fertility laws and co-parenting options / Stonewall.org.uk
• Co-parenting / Alternative Family Law Gay and Lesbians

Donor conception in the UK

Yet some women find getting pregnant to be their best option, either because of the high costs or the long delays experienced when trying to get treatment at a licensed clinic or because they want to avoid repeated invasive medical procedures. In this case, the determination of parental rights does not fall under the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Act and the sperm donor counts as the father. If he and the mother agree, he may relinquish his rights as a father so that the mother´s partner can adopt the child. Or he may want to remain the legal father and play a significant role in the child´s up-bringing. Issues may arise in cases where the sperm donor and the mother disagree. In this case, the donor is legally considered to be the biological father, and resulting parental responsibility will apply, such as child visitation rights or child financial support duties, among others. Contacting an alternative family law specialist is the best way to enquire about one’s own parental rights before going into a private donor agreement via self-insemination.

Donors on Future Family
Via Future Family you will only find non-anonymous donors. These donors are therefore known to the mother and (later) the child. Conversely, the mother is also known to the donor via One Wish and the donor can therefore choose to whom he donates. Please note that different rules and registration forms may apply in foreign clinics.

Parenting plan, co-parenting agreement or donor contract
This is an agreement between the donor and mother or co-parents plus any partners. The intention and mutual agreements are described in this document. The agreement serves as a guide to make such arrangements. In the event of any subsequent disagreements, the agreement clearly reflects the initial situation. However, many agreements that are usually made in an agreement are legally considered null and void.

Some examples of legal cases involving disputes over parental rights and responsibilities can be found on the Natalie Gamble Associates website.

FUTURE FAMILY LIBRARY

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→ Medical info
→ Read Questions & Answers about the concepts of co-parenting, donorship, prospective parent and biological parenting 

Additional info and links

→ Natalie Gable Associates.
The UK’s first specialist fertility law team, has leading expertise and unrivalled experience in assisted reproduction and family law disputes involving modern families.

Co-parentship

What is co-parentship?
Co-parentship is explained in the most simple way as two (or more) individuals sharing parenthood to one- or more children.
Co-parentship can start before the child is born by two people who want to start a family on a friendship basis. Co-parentship is more commonly known as a results after a marriage ends. In that case the (legal) co-parentship is usually forced by the relationship split.

If you do not want to start the upbringing alone, but together with someone, you can opt for co-parenting instead of a donor. A co-parent is a parent who shares the upbringing of a child in a small or large degree with another co-parent. At Future Family, at least two of the connecting co-parent parties are also the child’s biological parent. This means that you are going to have a child with the aspiring mother, father or donor you meet via Future Family. Is there a couple of two women or two men? Then you agree together which of the two will become the biological father and which woman will bear the child and is the biological mother.

In co-parenting, the child will be raised by both the mother (s) and the father (s). The co-parents do not need to have to have a romantic relationship with each other nor do they have to live in the same house. In joint coordination they share in a small or large degree the care, financial burdens and happiness in addition to raising a child..

Dividing co-parentship
This can be a 50/50 distribution, but other distributions are also possible. For example, an 90/10 or 70/30 arrangement whereby your child will only live with the father (s) during holidays and / or weekends. Again, there are of course several options; regular contact or not, and more importantly, whether or not the biological father recognizes your child. There are several advantages to co-parenting, because you can share the care (s), costs and the parent time. Co-parenting will also give your child more personalities to reflect on, two ‘families’ with different ways of living and thinking, two parents / parents with different talents and shortcomings. Your residential location can also be important. If one lives relatively close to each other in the neighborhood, the child can easily and independently commute back and forth between the houses on his own initiative. Consider also the possibility to become neighbors or the possibility to let your child (ren) live in the same house and to switch homes as parents, so that the child lives in a fixed location.

What do you wish for the child?
Of course there is someone else to consider besides yourself, your partner and the other parent (s), namely your unborn future child.
We at Future Family belief that every child world-wide should have the freedom of choice to know their biological parents (when growing up). To be able to mirror and know who he or she originates from. We don’t find it undesirable if a child can only find out who the anonymously traceable sperm donor was after the age of 16. Also check with yourself, would you find it difficult if you did not know who your biological father is during your entire childhood?
For more information, see this short movie about Fathers Day.

Make clear agreements and arrangements
It is important to get a clear picture of each other’s wishes and expectations during the introduction time. For example, feelings and situations can change with respect to each other and the child later on. It is therefore important to make realistic agreements in advance. Be prepared to sit around the table regularly and spend time adjusting the arrangements to everyone’s satisfaction. Note that you can now look at things very differently than when you are actually older and the child is in your life. Record agreements in a co-parent plan, but at the same time leave room for what everyone is going through and what is possibly best for your child. Legal professionals emphasize that parents are not supposed to derive rights from a donor plan. Many parents view the plan as a checklist and a means of aligning mutual expectations. The extent to which you record agreements in a donorship plan depends on your own feeling and understanding. When deviating from the agreements made, it is wise to adjust the plan if mutual agreed upon.

Parenting plan, donorship plan or donor contract
This is a plan or agreement between the aspiring father / donor and the aspiring mother or co-parents plus any partners. This sets out expectations and mutual agreements. The plan serves as a guide to make such arrangements. In the event of any later disagreements, the plan clearly reflects the initial situation agreed upon. However, know that these agreements are usually legally considered null and void. When appropriate, it is recommended that the plan be included in a notarial deed, as this provides compelling evidence and has added value.

When you’ve found your match we advise you to talk to and experience expert and even better a notary specialised in the topic of co-parenthsip or donorship. This person can navigate you verbally and writtenly through all chapters that should be included in the agreement.

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